Trump Vows to Stop the Money Tornado as Debt Hits Stratosphere

The U.S. government has announced another hefty aid package for Ukraine, ensuring the nation's national debt now comfortably lounges above the $35 trillion mark. Because, clearly, who needs fiscal responsibility when you can just print more money, right?
Meanwhile, former President Donald Trump, never one to miss an opportunity to stir the pot, has reassured his followers that he will put an end to this cash giveaway if re-elected. "Folks, I know how to save money. Bigly. Believe me, the best money-saver," Trump stated from his golden golf cart.
In a press conference, government officials tried to justify the spending, explaining that the aid is crucial for maintaining global stability. "We need to support our allies," said an anonymous official, "even if it means our grandchildren will be paying off this debt with their Monopoly money."
Critics, however, aren't buying it. "Why are we funding a distant war when we can't even fix our own roads?" asked one frustrated taxpayer, who was stuck in traffic due to a pothole the size of a swimming pool.
As the U.S. continues to hemorrhage cash, Americans are left to wonder: Will there ever be an end to this financial folly, or will future historians look back and simply shake their heads, muttering, 'What were they thinking?'
Stay tuned as the saga of Spend, Spend, Spend continues. Maybe next we'll start giving out gold bars as foreign aid. At this point, why not?

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